I just edited a bit of copy on this web site:
Brendon Sinclair’s web and marketing tips blog – read heaps of articles, blog posts and much more.
Brendon Sinclair’s web and marketing tips blog – get your business booming with real life practical tips and examples to make you more money.
See how that second one is far more compelling because it promises a benefit for the reader?
That can be all it takes to generate that lead.